Monday, February 27, 2017

Love bites

MK: Momma Kat
BC: Bear Cat

Daily conversation - Love bites:
The Boy: Where do you keep the treats?
MK: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
BC: RATS! Come on! Tell him! Tell him! I want to know too! And if you tell him AND kill him, that solves both of my problems at once! I'll know where the treats are and The Boy will be gone!
The Boy: Come on! I want to give him some treats!
BC: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!
MK: You're the one that always says he's fat!
BC: HEY! 
The Boy: Well yeah ...
BC: DOUBLE HEY!!!!

The Boy: ... but if I give him a few treats he might like me.
BC: Phht. Not likely.
MK: You want to give a fat cat treats?
BC: That sounds like a GREAT idea! Minus the I'm fat part.
The Boy: I want him to like me.
BC: Which is EXACTLY why I never will.

The Boy: Do you mind?
BC: Nope. I live here. 
The Boy: So do I.
BC: Don't rub it in. 
{Stare down between The Boy and Bear Cat}

BC: My Momma has a thing for morons.
The Boy: You would know!
BC: You. Did. Not. Just. Go. There.
The Boy: I did.
BC: Oh, no, you didn't.
The Boy: Oh, yes, I did.
BC: Where are my treats? You DEFINITELY said treats! Momma! Didn't he say treats?

MK: I'm staying out of this.
BC: HEY!
The Boy: HEY!
{Bear bites Momma}
MK: OWWW! BEAR! Keep your teeth to yourself!
The Boy: {to Momma} That was just a love bite!
BC: {to The Boy} Are you STILL here?
The Boy: I live here!
BC: Yeah, yeah, don't rub it in.
The Boy: BITE ME!
BC: With pleasure!

The Boy: Oh, no no no no no no no. Not the ...
BC: I'm the shark!
MK: BEAR! Keep your teeth to yourself.
BC: FINE! But you didn't say anything about my claws!
MK: BEAR!
The Boy: Uh oh.
BC: I thought you said you weren't taking sides!
MK: I'm not! I just don't want to clean up blood all over the place. Again.
BC: BUT he said the word treats and didn't give me any treats!

The Boy: You started it!
BC: No, YOU started it!
The Boy: YOU!
BC: YOU!
The Boy: YOU!
BC: NO! YOU!
The Boy: Where'd she go?
BC: Who?
The Boy: Your Momma! I just turned around and she was gone.
BC: What?!?! You need her to protect you?
The Boy: I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, thank you.
BC: You're welcome.
The Boy: I didn't REALLY mean ...
BC: I bet she hid in the closet.
The Boy: WHAT?
BC: Yeah, sometimes when you're annoying her, she hides in the closet and closes the door.
The Boy: Why would she do that?
BC: Ummm ... BECAUSE YOU'RE ANNOYING HER!

The Boy: You have a lot of experience with that?
BC: No.
{Pause}
BC: Err ... yes!
{Pause}
BC: Err ... was that a trick question?
The Boy: HONEY?!?!
MK: I'm not coming out until you two stop acting like children.
BC: I'm not acting like a child!
The Boy: Are too!
BC: Am not!
The Boy: Are too! 
BC: We should see how far each of us can pee.
The Boy: You should pick a battle you can win.
BC: HEY! Yesterday, I said I needed a do over! A gentleman would allow a do over!

The Boy: You requested a do over THREE TIMES!
BC: Well, EXCUSE ME that my aim isn't as good as yours! 
{Pause}
BC: HEY! We should have a barfing contest!
The Boy: No.
BC: Are you SCARED I'll win?
The Boy: NO!
{Pause}
MK: Hi ...
BC: BARF BARF BARF BARF!
MK: Oh, for the love of ...
The Boy: HONEY! This isn't what it looks like!
MK: NOPE! I'm going back in the closet.
BC: Hehehehe. It was EXACTLY what it looks like!
The Boy: SHHHH! Don't we have some kind of boy code or something?
BC: You mean like signals or gestures? Because I don't have balls, so I can't scratch them!
The Boy: No, I meant not telling on each other and agreeing with each other when one of us is lying!
BC: YOU LIE to my Momma?!?! SIR! You should be ashamed! I'm going to tell my Momma you want to recruit me into your treachery and lies!
The Boy: NO! That's not what I ...
BC: Momma said that while she's gone you can give me as many treats as you want.

The Boy: I didn't hear that.
BC: I'm the shark!
The Boy: OWWWWW!
BC: That was just a love bite.
The Boy: @#$& the &$@! So help me ... ^@#%!
BC: Hehehehehehehe.

Featured posts of the day:

57 comments:

  1. BC, you and that Boy cat better start getting along. No fun to fight all the time. Have a good Monday.

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  2. This post made me laugh! Lovely boys, but not good at sharing!
    That's Purrfect

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    1. We love hearing we made people laugh ... that's the highest compliment! ~Bear Cat

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  3. Haha boys will be boys! You guys settle down!

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    1. That's what my Momma keeps saying! ~Bear Cat

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    2. Where is the fun in that? We are required to drive your momma crazy, aren't we Bear?

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    3. I have no idea what you're talking about LS ... I'm just a cute, sweet, and innocent kitty cat! ~Bear Cat

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  4. Hoomins just can't win in a cat argument. So give Bear Shark treats and all will be well.

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  5. How dare the Boy call you fat!!! You're a very healthy boycat, Bear! Don't let anyone tell you any different.

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    1. Hmph. HE'S just jealous. It's obvious. Not everyone can be as fabulous as I am! ~Bear Cat

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  6. Oh Bear, let's keep away from anything that might mean a diet, you sure aren't fat!

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    1. I know! I'm just ... just ... SPECIAL! ~Bear Cat

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  7. Kitties need treats! The End--Signed, Lucy from It's All About the Cats

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    1. You are absolutely right! It's not easy being a cat! ~Bear Cat

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  8. MOL ! Boys... Your mom is wise to stay out of this, Bear ! Purrs

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    1. Given the laughing I heard coming from the closet, she enjoyed this conversation way more than she'll ever admit to! ~Bear Cat

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  9. OH MY CATS we are cackling like two old hens here
    Hugs madi your bfff and mom

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    Replies
    1. Cackling hens! That was the sound coming from my Momma's closet! She was LAUGHING at us! ~Bear Cat

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  10. *cough* BC, did you actually say MORONS? EPIC. E-P-I-C!!

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    1. I wasn't talking about me!! Err ... HEY! At least I'm cute! ~Bear Cat

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  11. Yep Bear, dat's da way it always starts. Da meany boy taunts and tempts you with treats and never follows thru. Then, he wants to be your furiend, so he can blame you fur all da messes he makes. Then, he starts lyin' to your mommy and blames it all on you. Befur ya know it, you'll get da blame fur everythin' and he'll look like golden donuts to your mommy. Ya need to take him out now. Want some help? MOL big hugs

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    Replies
    1. I need a plan of attack ... you ladies are right! Time to kick some Boy butt! ~Bear Cat

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  12. Whoa! He's even more annoying than your momma cat. Perhaps you should come over here for a few days. You do here a transport tunnel, don't you?

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    1. RATS! I KNEW my Momma was holding out on me! I'm going to build one though ... with STUFF! ~Bear Cat

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  13. That's right Bear you keep giving out your "LOVE" bites he he! Amarula is gonna give that a try as well as try your toaster trick!! The human has unplugged it just in case--Bear you are a character!

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    Replies
    1. I've had lots of practice! Of course, I'm also grounded until well into my ninth life ... so there is that. ~Bear Cat

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  14. You better get some treats from someone- or maybe a tasty whole chicken.

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    1. I think I should get both given everything I have to put up with!! ~Bear Cat

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  15. Hey Bear! It has been proven in a lab somewhere that treats don't make you fat! Now love bites? That's another matter! MOL xx

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    1. Do love bites make my butt look big? Is that the problem? ~Bear Cat

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  16. Things must have gotten serious, what with you resorting to a battle of the bladders. Oh, and Bear, Evan says he also thinks love bites are the best way to get your point across. When your words don't get through, those teeth sure will!

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    1. EXACTLY! Sometimes you just have to show a little muscle for the humans to get it! ~Bear Cat

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  17. Bear you win ALL of the time!!!!!!! You kill me!! xoxo catchatwithcarenandcody

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    1. I've had lots of practice in winning ... it's true! ~Bear Cat

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  18. Psssst! Bear, I think you may have challenged the boy to the wrong match! For it to be a fair fight it has to be equal, by which I mean balanced in your favour on account of your size. Try something useful, like chicken wrangling, or a Mouse hunt, that always separates the Cats from the boys! Purrs, ERin PS In this Palace guests get treated the same.... they either get ointment and bandages, or they have their legs pulled off!

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    Replies
    1. Oooh. Chicken wrangling!!! Chicken. Wrangling. The PERFECT excuse to get a chicken! Or ten! I like this! Hahaha. My Momma offers complimentary bandaids for every visitor. And Tums. Though I'm not entirely sure what that is for ... ~Bear Cat

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    2. Hehe, peep thought, in a tied daze, that your peep will be offering 'bandaid for every visitor and then turns on them! That, I thought, sounded impressive tactics! Offering Tums is more my job here, to save on food poisoning law suits. Mouses!

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  19. You know what they say. They say, "A kiss is just a kiss. A sigh is just a sigh. A bite is just a bite." What's that, Peepers? They don't say exactly that? REALLY? Hmmm.... Well BC and I are sayin' it so that's that. MOUSES!

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    1. Yes, if we say it, it MUST be true! You know those Peeps ... can't sort their own stuff out most of the time - but they're always trying to tell US what's up ;) ~Bear Cat

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  20. I like the way you stand your ground, Bear. Remember, HE is the interloper, and he needs to accept his place at the rear of the pack. That's just the way it's done.

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    1. Ooooh! I'm going to tell him that! You're right! ~Bear Cat

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  21. HI Bear, just nipping by to say how very much I love this post, and great to see it in the Pet Blogger Showcase. Purrs for a great weekend! Erin

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    1. Thank you, Erin! We hope you and your Peep have a peaceful and restful weekend :)

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  22. Oh boy. Excuse the pun. If I was Momma I'm pretty sure I'd be hiding in the closet too! BOL
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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    1. That pun is great! I'd wait a couple years ... but yeah ... they're still going to be this way!

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  23. Bear, do not tolerate anyone calling you fat! And we definitely think you should give that boy lots of "love" bites! hehehe

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  24. Well there's my laugh for the day! Sounds like you have 2 of a kind there. I'm sure the closet is probably a good idea sometimes. LOL

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    1. It's the highest compliment to know that we made someone laugh! And yes, the closet works nicely :)

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  25. Cats are far to clever for mere boys. Keep up the good work, Bear.

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