Friday, July 22, 2016

* * * - - - * * *

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat

Daily conversation * * * - - - * * * :
BC: I wan ... Momm .... a ... MOMMA! .... WANT .... MROOWWWWWW! HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
MK: Bear? Bear! Wake up!
BC: Huh? WHERE AM I? Where are THEY?

MK: They who?
BC: You know WHO! They were just here a minute ago!
MK: Bear, you were dreaming.
BC: WHAT?!?! I only dream about tasty whole chickens and gorgeous, voluptuous, sensual female ... umm ... err ... porcupines!
MK: You were definitely dreaming, Bear.
BC: Are you SURE? Because there were DEFINITELY no raunchy, lascivious ... umm ... hmmm ....
MK: Bear?
BC: Hmmm? 
{Pause}
MK: Bear?
BC: Do you mind? I'm having a PRIVATE moment!

MK: You were saying how you didn't believe you were dreaming because there weren't any ... umm ... porcupines.
BC: Why would I dream of porcupines?
MK: Never mind.
BC: So I WAS dreaming?
MK: Yes. I've been sitting here working on our blog post and you've DEFINITELY been here the entire time ... curled up asleep in my desk chair.
BC: {looking around, then whispering} Are you sure I'm not being beamed around the universe? Tripping through snake holes or something?
MK: You mean WORM holes?
BC: {GASP} SO IT'S TRUE! I WAS ABDUCTED BY ALIENS!
MK: Bear ...
BC: And YOU delivered me into their furry .... furry .... WHATEVER THEIR FURRY ARM APPENDAGES ARE!
MK: They don't have regular hands?
BC: THEY'RE ALIENS Momma! OF COURSE they don't have hands! Or ... wait ... not that I saw. Between those reaching furry things and the 72.908 eyes ... I was kind of distracted.
MK: I'm sorry ... 72.908 eyes?
BC: So you've seen them! You bartered me to them!
MK: No, I was clarifying .... {sigh} why don't you just start at the beginning.
BC: Are you SPYING for them?
MK: Bear ...
BC: I mean how many OTHER aliens have 72.908 eyes?
MK: Just tell me what happened.
BC: We were cuddling like a normal night and all of a sudden an ORANGE HOLE formed right in the middle of the hallway!
MK: Black hole?
BC: ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING? There was a HOLE. And the HOLE was ORANGE.
MK: So we're talking about a ring of color versus gravitational forces or gravitational lensing of a massively dense object.
BC: I'm sorry ... all I heard was BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
MK: Did you eat some of the salmon treats I gave you earlier in the day right before your nap? Because they're sprinkled with catnip.
BC: NO. I DID NOT eat the salmon treats before my nap ... err ... not ALL of them ... at once.
MK: {sigh} Go on.
BC: Then Gary and Larry POOFED out of the purple hole ...
MK: I thought it was an orange hole.
BC: I'm sorry. When I'm being ABDUCTED BY ALIENS I didn't realize the COLOR of the HOLE they POOFED out of mattered!
MK: {sigh} Continue.
BC: So GARY and LARRY, those TROUBLE-MAKING aliens made you choose a sacrifice.
MK: Err ... and I didn't choose the Big Dodo?
BC: We haven't talked to the Big Dodo in YEARS, why would you care about what happens to him?
MK: Good point.
BC: No. You had to choose between me and Kit Kats!
MK: Uh oh.
BC: THAT'S RIGHT! You forked me over like a juicy, succulent ... succulent ... tasty whole chicken!
MK: I didn't offer myself instead of you first?
BC: I'm sorry, who's story is this? OKAY, Yes, You DID in fact say you'd sacrifice yourself to save me. But ... well ... it's YOU.
MK: Uh huh.
BC: So the aliens and I backwards poofed into the orange hole and the next thing I knew we were on their spaceship.
MK: Can they steer a spaceship without hands?
BC: WOULD YOU JUST LET ME FINISH?
MK: Okay. What happened next?
BC: I yelled for you and did my yowling and everything!
MK: Maybe the aliens don't have ears?
BC: Then how did they hear you choose Kit Kats over me?
MK: Bear, I wouldn't choose Kit Kats over you.
BC: EASY to say NOW! The damage HAS BEEN DONE!
MK: {sigh} What happened next?
BC: They started arguing with each other, but instead of words, strings of numbers were coming out.
MK: Cool. Was the base like 10 or 100?
BC: NO! I'm still on their SPACESHIP, not on their planet at their base!
MK: No, what range of numbers were they saying?
BC: A bunch of dots then a bunch of dashes, then back to dots again!
MK: Just curious ... but I thought you said NUMBERS.
BC: YES! Dashes and dots.
MK: I guess I should be lucky you don't do our taxes. Let me guess ... there were three dots and three dashes and then another three dots.
BC: {GASP} YOU SPEAK THEIR LANGUAGE!
MK: Umm ... no. That's basic Morse code for SOS.
BC: Who's MORRIS and what does he have to do with the ALIENS Gary and Larry?
MK: {barely containing her laughter} So in other words, your infamous endless howling caused the aliens to reconsider their cat napping.
BC: I saved myself?
MK: I guess.
BC: BUT YOU! YOU BETRAYED ME AND GAVE ME OVER THE THEM!

MK: Bear, you haven't moved from that chair.
BC: Well, OF COURSE you would say that to save your own behind.
MK: So what happened after all the dots and dashes?
BC: I heard an annoying voice beckoning me ... I was sure I was about to meet my marker.
MK: Maker?
BC: Make what?
MK: Never mind.
BC: Then I woke up in my desk chair to the same annoying voice calling my name.
{Pause}
BC: YOU! I KNEW I'd heard that "BEAR!" "BEAR!" BEAR!" before! Sometimes I get tired of my OWN name with how often you say it.
MK: Or you could just not get into trouble.
{Silence}
MK: So I'm your marker?
BC: Marker for what? Usually I just use my claws.
MK: Never mind.


Pictures of the Day:
A hint of the theme for our Sunday Selfie entry ...



Featured posts of the Day:
*** Did you miss the introduction of Bear's aliens, Gary and Larry?
*** Bear Cat LOVES an audience ... he frequently struts around for me to admire him and also makes sure I'm watching him before he does something he's not supposed to do. Bear also constantly demands something: attention, love, food, play time, outside . . . he's a cat and he KNOWS what he wants. He's perfected his stare so that I can't miss the obvious glare of disappointment and dissatisfaction ... and I'm constantly aware that I ignore him at my own peril. If you've ever read about the demands entertainers, or "stars," make on tour, imagine what a very persnickety, diva-like cat would ask for, in addition to his daily usual demands. Unfortunately, Momma doesn't always cooperate. With Bear's flair for the dramatic, life is just one performance after another. Luckily, Bear has no shortage of adoring fans (including Momma) ... even if those adoring fans at other times are known as infidels . . . and are issued challenges by Mr. Tough Pants (and again, Momma is the frequent object of his displeasure). Read more in Kitty Diva or Pop "Tart?"

21 comments:

  1. OMC Bear you really had an adventure. Are you sure it was all a dream? Don't know who dat KitKat is, but he/she must be purretty special ifin you think your mommy would choose them over you, cuz we know she thinks you're special. We do too. Great fotos. Stay cool and have a great day.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    1. I'm keeping my eye on Momma for awhile ... I wouldn't put it past her to be working with the aliens! ~Bear

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  2. What did you eat Bear? I know when Seville ( of Nerissa's Life) eats cheese, he dreams of talking mice, maybe you ate something that made you have wild dreams.

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    1. Good point! I bet I wouldn't have had that dream if I'd eaten tasty whole chickens! ~Bear Cat

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  3. Whpa! A handsome mancat. I wanna know what you've been smokin and can I have in on the action?

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    1. Oooh. Thank you. I'll share with a gorgeous girl any day :) ~Bear Cat

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  4. Whoa! That was some dream, Bear. Or was it really a dream???? ;)

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    1. I'm keeping my eye on my Momma, for sure! ~Bear Cat

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  5. Whoa, Bear. That was some dream! Or ... was it? Trust no one!

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    1. I've got my eye on my Momma ... and those Kit Kats! ~Bear Cat

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  6. I've always wondered what kitties dream about. Now I know - dots and dashes. Better not eat anymore nip before dozing off. Said no cat ever.

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  7. Bear Cat sounds like the king of drama, and he definitely has some very vivid dreams!
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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    1. Thank you for stopping by! Yes, he's a cat and he knows how to bring the drama when he wants to :)

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  8. Oh my goodness! What a story! And I thought my life was exciting ... Fun narrative though. I love your humorous was of writing. I'm glad I found you on the Pet Blogger Showcase! This is my first time here. I'll be on the lookout for you now. Nice to meet ya! Stay on the lookout for those ... porcupines!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! And thank you for stopping by! It's our first week in the Showcase ... so we're a little excited but nervous too.

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  9. That is awesome!!! And you look just like my beloved Filkin :)

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  10. Oh you were abducted by aliens! What an abduction story that was and you were very brave - that was a terrible dream and perhaps it was an off Salmon treat that inspired such a story!

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  11. Oh my, sometimes I have dreams that seem SO real...I hope yours was just that...a real seeming dream. I'm pretty sure A Mama would not barter her baby to aliens.

    Thanks for adding your post to the linky party!

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