Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Iz speako nodo engleeesh

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat

Daily conversation - Iz speako nodo engleeesh:
MK: La-di-da. Di-da. La ... wha?
MK: {SNIFF. SNIFF?} What the ?
MK: BEAR!
BC: I didn't do it!
MK: Why's there crushed kibble ... 
{Pause}
MK: EWWWWWWWWWWW! Why's there BARFED kibble on my desk chair?
BC: You're the one that was sitting in the chair!
MK: (BLEEP)! It's on my butt! It's on my butt!
BC: HAHAHAHAHAHA ... you're dancing! You're dancing! This is hilarious! Keep dancing! Keep dancing! This one's funny!
{Silence as Momma stares at Bear}
BC: So now your butt barfs kibble? I KNEW my kibble was disappearing faster than usual. Keep your butt out of my food bowl!
MK: BEAR!
BC: At least your towel was over the chair!
MK: Funny you say that because SOMECAT barfed on the one inch by one inch square that WASN'T covered!
BC: Target prac ... I mean ... SOMEbutt must've been target practicing.
MK: But not your butt.
BC: Don't be ridiculous. Butts don't barf. Err ... I mean CATS' butts don't barf.
MK: I mean REALLY Bear? It's not bad enough that you STEAL my desk chair, but now you barf all over it?
BC: It wasn't ALL over it! Just that inch by .... RATS!
{Pause}
BC: I have no idea what you're talking about.
{Silence}
BC: And by the way, my food bowl needs refilling. Your butt is greedy.
MK: Do you ever listen to yourself?
BC: I'm sorry. Are you trying to argue that your butt isn't greedy? Because it almost takes up the whole desk chair! For your butt to sit in the one inch by one inch spot with the barfage, it has to be huge enough .... RATS!
MK: You seem to know a lot about the size and position of the barf spot.
BC: Iz speako nodo engleeesh.
MK: TREATS!
BC: WHERE?
{Pause}
BC: RATS! I mean treats ... RATS!
MK: Catnip!
BC: Come to pap ... (BLEEP)! How can you sleep with how you trick your cute little kitty cat?
MK: How do you sleep with how you barf on my desk chair?
BC: I'm a cat!
MK: In response to the first clause or the second?
BC: My claws respond to everything!
MK: Isn't that the truth.
BC: I HATE YOU!
MK: And yet YOU'RE the one barfing on my stuff.
BC: Barfing is such a crude word.
MK: What would you call it?
BC: RATS! Iz speako nodo engleeesh.
MK: Time to brush your teeth!
BC: I'm getting of here! 
{Pause}
BC: RATS! If you stopped tricking me, I'd maybe stop barfing on your ...
{Pause}
BC: RATS!

Pictures of the Day:




Featured posts of the Day:
To read more about the desk chair wars:
*** To read about the beginning of the desk chair wars: Chair + Towel + Cat = Tons of Pictures. The pictures aren't up to current standards, but it gives you an idea of the history.
*** Another series on the desk chair wars occurs in "Conversations" With Bear Cat: Part 12 (On the desk chair wars, parts 1-3).
*** The three most recent updates to the desk chair saga are found in, "Conversations" With Bear Cat: Part 23 ("On sharing selfishness"), "Conversations" With Bear Cat: Part 24 ("On MOO!"), and Loud, proud ... and blunt.

14 comments:

  1. Never mind Bear, sometimes its better to the chase and just to throw up in the bath. Personally, I go for the severed mouse, or live pigeon, mole, rat, rabbit or frog in the bath and the bed, way more interesting and if not found straight away makes for hours of fun and a supprise shower time. purrs ERin

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    Replies
    1. Why's Momma cringing? That sounds like heaven!

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  2. Oh meow what great fotos. As fur da barf...a cat's gotta do what a cat's gotta do. Altho' mommy purrays everyday dat we don;t throw up. Not sure why, but we have found some really great places fur it. MOL Hope you got some nip Bear.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    Replies
    1. And there's TWO of you so you can always blame each other and no one really gets in trouble!!!

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  3. I am lucky with all my cats, I have never sat in it- stepped in a lot though :)

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    Replies
    1. I have to say the highlight was the time he threw up ON ME WHILE I was sleeping. Did I mention he'd been trying to wake me up by a variety of methods for the hour preceding that? Yep. I'm pretty sure it was on purpose.

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  4. I'm with Pilch! Never sat in kitty barf, but I have stepped in it. :-) At least Bear gives you good writing material!

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  5. I did it once from the top of the cat tree : a real volcano ! But none sat in it... Purrs, Pixie

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    Replies
    1. I LOVE doing that!!! Extra points if a bit hits each perch and level and you also manage to get it dripping down the walls :) ~Bear Cat

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  6. Oh my mouses! OH MY MOUSES! Your peeps' butt barfs kibble? WHO KNEW? This is hilarious. And newsworthy, too!

    Purrs,
    Seville

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    Replies
    1. Ours are so talented! Yours at mouse CPR and mine at butt barfing. No wonder we didn't win any awards this year! Bear Cat

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  7. MOL this brings to mind one of my favorite (not) cat memories. I came home from shopping one night, sat on the couch without looking...and instantly jumped back up with a *very* wet bottom. The cat before Tara, Sashi, had puked there...and I was wearing SHORTS!!!

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    Replies
    1. When Momma moved in with her ex-husband (before the ex part), the cat she had at the time, Kitty, peed in her bed every day for a couple months. Momma didn't even realize it at first because she usually got a shower before bed - she just thought she hadn't dried her feet well enough. Until the smell made it obvious. Oh, and I barfed on my Momma once WHILE she was sleeping because she didn't wake up with the other 20 things I tried to wake her up. I'm not sorry. ~Bear Cat

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