Monday, September 5, 2016

Paw Prints = BUSTED!

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat


Daily conversation - Paw Prints = BUSTED!:
MK: BEAR!
BC: I didn't do it!
MK: Do what?
BC: Eat ...
{Pause}
BC: RATS!
MK: {looking at the kitchen table} BEAR! Where's my lunch?
BC: (BURP)!
MK: BEAR!
BC: La de da ... de ... da ...
MK: I WAS just going to ask you why the roll of paper towels is on the floor ... but YOU ATE MY LUNCH!?!?!
BC: Oops.
MK: I swear! I turn around for ONE SECOND to pick up the roll of paper towels on the floor and the next thing I know, my lunch sprouts legs and runs off.
BC: Well, TECHNICALLY, it didn't sprout legs or run off.
MK: I used a new recipe. How was the chicken? 
BC: CHICKEN?!?! Was that this "chicken of the sea" crap? What kind of recipe makes chicken taste like tuna? It tasted like tu ...
{Pause}
BC: RATS! You always TRICK me!
MK: {sigh} How did the paper towels get on the floor?
BC: I have no idea.
MK: Uh huh.
BC: WHAT?!?!
MK: Were you on the counter, Bear?
BC: NO!
MK: Then why are there paw prints across the glass top of the range?

BC: I was framed!
MK: {sigh}.
BC: Why would I be on the counter? There's nothing up there I want! You put everything away except for the paper towels!
MK: And how would you know that?
BC: RATS!
{Pause}
BC: Err ... I'm just GUESSING that there's nothing up there worth playing with.
MK: So how did your paw prints get across the top of the range?
BC: I was following the buffalo?
MK: What buffalo?
BC: On the range! {AHEM!!}
Oh give me a home where the buffalo roam,
Where the deer and the antelope play,
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word,
And the skies are not cloudy all day.
MK: I'm sorry I asked.
BC: Aren't you usually?
MK: So the paw prints?
BC: Hmph. They aren't from today.
MK: You were on the counter on another day?
BC: Ummm ...
MK: Because I cleaned the counters and stove top off yesterday evening before bed ... so the prints had to be made after that ... which means you were on the counter more than once if you were also on the counter another day other than today.
BC: RATS!
{Pause}
BC: I REALLY hate that flat glass top!
MK: Or you could stay off the kitchen counter.
BC: Surely there's a statue of limitations for getting in trouble! Like twenty-four hours? So the misdeeds of yesterday are irrelevant.
MK: No.
BC: Immunity?
MK: No.
BC: Right against self incrimination?
MK: Nope.
BC: Forgiveness?
MK: Do I ever hold anything against you?
BC: Well, no.
MK: Uh huh.
BC: Your lunch was tasty.
MK: I'm glad you enjoyed it.
BC: Can you make me ... I mean ... err ... you, another lunch?
MK: Don't push it.
BC: You're eating doughnuts for lunch? THAT seems unhealthy.
MK: Well, yes. Some cat ate the lunch I prepared.
BC: You left your lunch out on purpose so I'd eat it and you'd have an excuse to just eat doughnuts!
MK: I'm not sorry.
BC: Don't expect more room on the desk chair when you demand we share! I'm not giving up any space so your entire doughnut butt fits on the chair!
MK: This from the cat that the vet reminds me isn't missing any meals. And the cat that's been refusing to play with me.
BC: But you get mad at me when I get exercise playing with the roll of paper towels!
{Pause}
BC: Uh oh. RATS! This is a really bad day. Well, except for the tuna sandwich. That was tasty.

Momma's "sharing selfishness."


Bear ... and the only remaining item on the kitchen counters that he can mess with ... the roll of paper towels. And no, he's not sorry.

Pictures of the Day:
Bear's quite the counter cruiser ...

(LEFT): Bear, about to jump from the counter on one side of the kitchen to the counter on the other side of the kitchen ...
(RIGHT): Bear contemplating how to snag the toy kept in the pantry (the blue fabric and wire) because it's a toy he can only have with supervision.


Bear trying to snag the toy kept in the pantry (the white fabric and wire) while the door is open, because it's a toy he can only have with supervision.


(LEFT): Bear trying to snag the toy kept in the pantry (the white fabric and wire) because it's a toy he can only have with supervision.
(RIGHT): Bear waiting for Momma to take his wet food treat out of the refrigerator.


Bear looking for trouble ... that glass's days are numbered.

Featured posts of the Day:

22 comments:

  1. Now see I was on my way with my magic eraser to get rid of the evidence ...just focus on the tuna sandwich. Tuna makes all bad days good

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True. The only thing that could make tuna better is if it came in gravy! ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  2. Oh Bear, we think you may soon be in trouble handsum. We were asked how to train a kitty to stay off da counters etc. and sure nuff, mommy has a trainin' technique fur dat. Ya' might wanna hide our post notifications from your mommy cuz there's no way mommy will let us get away with not writin' 'bout it. Altho' we's never seen one of those flat glass top ovens befur. Dat's really cool. Sendin' ya'll big hugs. Hope you have a great day.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll just pretend I didn't hear about the training technique ... what Momma doesn't know doesn't hurt her ;) ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  3. Fear not brave Bear, it was those tasty chickens that framed thee. Verily the evidence is plain to see by its very absence, there are no claw prints of those pesky birds so it must have been they who by default did the deed. In fact t'is know they favour kitchen towels to line their nests. Failing that plead the fifth and hire a great attorney. purrs ERin PS leaving a tuna sandwich out I think is called entrapment, you get off scott free and get compensation too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How much do you charge to be part of my legal team? Or could I pay you in tuna? ~Bear Cat
      ps - It it entrapment!!! What poor kitty could resist tuna yumminess?

      Delete
  4. Come to my house, Bear, I'm allowed on the kitchen counters! --Mudpie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A silver lining to getting in trouble!!!! ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  5. Do you need a mouthpiece, Bear? I know a good one. He can get you off. My price is half a tuna sammich.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good job bear!!! But...don't cha just hate those tell tale paw prints? I get busted ALL of the time, but sadly, it never involves tuna! Love, Cody catchatwithcarenandcody

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. {sigh} I'm always getting in trouble. I won't be un-grounded until some time during my 9th life. ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  7. Bear, the mom gave up long time ago trying to keep us off the kitchen counters...including the glass top stove. She just couldn't win the battle...and we won the war. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Here's a secret ... my Momma has given up too. She says in the realm of what's important ... me on the counters doesn't even register since it's very unlikely I could be hurt (why only paper towels are left out on the counter). But it still makes for a good post ... even if she's decided to choose other battles in reality :) ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  8. Bear, you are so cute. I love the photos of you breaking into the pantry. So was the tuna as good as a tasty whole chicken?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. If tuna came with its own gravy, it would be FAR FAR better than a tasty whole chicken! Though I suppose a TWC doesn't come with gravy either ... you have to cook it first :) ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  9. Claire gave up to keep off the kitchen counters and the stove all the time ; she's firm only when she's cooking. Purrs

    ReplyDelete
  10. DOH! Paw prints are pretty damning evidence. Nice try with the buffalo excuse, though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There ARE buffaloes on the range, right? ;) ~Bear Cat

      Delete
  11. I guess you need to figure out how to get rid of the paw prints!

    ReplyDelete