Saturday, July 30, 2016

Momma's revenge

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat


If you missed yesterday's post on Momma shaming (part 1), you can find it here: Momma shaming.

Daily conversation - Momma's revenge (Momma shaming - part 2):

BC: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!
{Pause}
BC: MoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmMMA! It's my food time!
MK: I'm in the middle of something, hang on.
BC: But I'm STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARVING!
MK: You have a full bowl of kibble.
BC: But I want FISHY! {SNORT!}
{Pause}
BC: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! {SNORT!} It's my food time! RIGHT. NOW. MMMMooooooooooooooooommmmMMMA! FEED ME!

MK: Just a ....
BC: {SNORT!} {Bear jumps down from the table}.
{Pause}
BC: I'm in the kitchen! On the counter! I'm on the KITCHEN COUNTER! WHERE I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE!!!

MK: Then get down!
{Pause}
BC: MAKE ME! I have my paw on the glass that's sitting on the microwave! The microwave on the same counter I'M sitting on that I'm not supposed to sit on! THE GLASS IS ABOUT TO GET IT if you don't feed me right now!

MK: Bear, just ....
{CRASH!}
MK: (BLEEP)!

BC: This didn't have to happen you know.
MK: {sigh}
BC: Are you going to put pictures of my masterpiece on our blog? Wait a ... what's this sign?!?!
MK: Yesterday you tried to convince everyone I was a mean Momma that tortured and starved my poor, innocent kitty cat. Today, our readers get the other side of the story.
BC: You ARE a mean ... {SNIFF} {SNIFF} ...
{Pause}
BC: Ooooooh! FISHY!  BEAR'S food time! YUMMY YUMMY in Bear's tummy! TASTY! NOW! NOW NOW! Nummy, yummy, tummy! In Bear's big belly!
MK: There you go.
{Momma goes back to the kitchen to clean up the mess, gets done and goes to sit down in her desk chair to get back to work ...}
MK: BEAR! Come on! I got up to feed you! Give me my chair.
BC: I was here FIRST.
MK: I just got up to feed you! And you jumped up the second you saw me walking toward the chair! You didn't even sit down yet!
BC: Bear doesn't share. Hmph. You humans and your sharing selfishness! Where'd this sign come from? What's it doing in MY chair?

BC: I DARE you to move me with your filthy paws!

MK: Bear! Please move.
BC: Nope.
MK: Share?
BC: Selfishness.
{Pause}
BC: MROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW! MY CHAIR!

MK: OWW!
BC: I'm not sorry.

BC: Move me and die.

MK: Come on, Bear!
BC: Do de do ... lick my back paw ... lalala ... lick my back paw ... lick my belly ... la la la ... lick my belly. You're once ... Twice! Three-ee times a tortie! And I looooooooo-ve you!

MK: Now you're into torties? What happened to the tabby?
{Pause}
MK: I know you hear me!
{Silence}
MK: Treats?
BC: WHERE?!?!
MK: AHA! You DO hear me!
BC: RATS!

BC: What are YOU looking at? Another stupid sign?

MK: At least MY signs tell the truth.
BC: Phht. Truth? What does that have to do with anything?
MK: Why am I not surprised?
BC: You humans get all caught up on the truth. 
MK: I'll give you more treats.
BC: Oh! OH! More treats for me! Bear's big belly bellows boisterously. TREATS! TREATS! TREATS!
{Pause}
BC: HEY! Where are you going? You said I get more treats!!
MK: Oh, I'm sorry, Bear. I didn't know you were interested in the truth. Us pesky humans and our "truth."
{Silence}
BC: Sometimes I really, REALLY, REALLY HATE you! Truth THAT!

Featured posts of the Day:
*** Does Bear's disregard for the truth remind you of anyone or does it strike you as vaguely "politician-esque?" Bear briefly considered a run for president (and becoming a crapper) in Momma's Sad . . . and Bear For President!
*** Bear previously had some fun with words that start with the letter "b" (like Bear's big belly bellows boisterously) in "On brutal biting" from "Conversations" With Bear Cat: Part 22.

18 comments:

  1. Ooops looks like a case of accidental glassceny going on... or put it down to a rogue tasty roast chicken that came to pinch your peeps chair! purrs ERin

    ReplyDelete
  2. Be careful when you break glasses, you don't want to step in it. I do like the sign " I break for food " :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Behind the scenes disclosure ... I would never let Bear near a glass that had just broken. In this case, I had one that cracked and broke in the dishwasher so I just arranged the three pieces I found and naturally he had to come and see what was going on. You're right though ... I should've explained that. I'd never forgive myself if Bear or any other cat was hurt because of me.

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  3. You go Bear! Nobody better mess with you! (I inspired your new tortie song, didn't I???) --Mudpie

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    Replies
    1. Yes Mudpie ... you did. I was hoping you'd pick up on that! ~Bear Cat

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    2. What?!? You mean it wasn't Olive? Are you two-timing, Bear? :-)

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  4. you two kill me!!!!!! Cody REALLY liked how you talked about being up on the counter where you aren't supposed to be! He does that too!!!!!! BTW thanks for putting some photos in between your text, it makes it so much easier to read!!!! (I am old and have old eyes lol!! This is the MOM talking, not Cody!) xoxoxo catchatwithcarenandcody

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    Replies
    1. Thank you - we're glad you enjoy our conversations. Momma's working to try to get more pictures in the daily posts for exactly the reason you said.

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  5. My two boys come over when they think it's dinner time to tell me they are rapidly losing weight and will fade away to nothing if I don't feed them immediately. Felix weighs at least 15 pounds and Lugosi is over 20! If we put food out on the porch for the neighborhood cats, the boys stare out the door as if I gave away their food.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know the struggle. Bear weighs 14 lb and he's constantly "starving." A few times, his act was so good that I checked his food bowl even though I knew I'd filled it an hour before :)

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  6. Maxwell: well firstly, the whole concept of broken glass might be unfortunate but there is the Law of Gravity that must continue to be observed if one is to maintain clarity of the scientific synapses ....

    uh, did I digress?

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    Replies
    1. My Momma just exclaimed, "I LOVE YOU, MAXIE!" Sheesh. How embarrassing! You get a little intellectual around her and she melts. ~Bear Cat

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  7. Bear, you gotta teach us how to make signs like that. We could use a few of them around here. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm left-pawed ... it takes lots of work, you know, without thumbs ... ~Bear Cat

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  8. I can't believe that you broke a glass, Bear! Sheesh!

    ReplyDelete