Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Let's Talk about Treats (Intervention - part 1)

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat

Daily conversation - Let's Talk about Treats:
MK: We need to have a talk.
BC: Awww ... MAAAAN. You talk ALL DAY long! Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah this ... and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah that! A cat can't get a second's peace in this house. They should call you "chatty kat!"
MK: Hahaha. No. We need to have a SERIOUS talk.
BC: We need to have a non-"blah" talk. Like about tasty whole chickens! Let's talk about tasty whole chickens! Or sardines! TREATS?
{singing} Let's talk about treats, ba-by
Let's talk about fish and me
Let's talk about all the nummy things
And the non-nummy things that may be.
MK: Let's start over. We need to talk about your catnip habit.
BC: What "habit?" I just refuse to leave my new catnip toys' sides. 

MK: Exactly.
BC: You might steal them and have your way with them. It's like I got PAID for you to disappear to the BlogPaws conference for a few days! Can you say QQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUI-ET!
MK: And you're being ... err ... extra strange.
BC: Says the person who goes around recounting her conversations with her cat to anyone who will listen.
MK: You need to take a break from the catnip.
BC: Phht. I can stop any time I want.
MK: Great. Right now.
BC: How about tomorrow?
MK: Now.
BC: But it's kind of a hot day and I could use the company of my imaginary catnip friends since you're too busy to play with me.
MK: You said that yesterday.
BC: I know!
MK: No more catnip.
BC: But I never inhaled ...
MK: Bear ...
BC: ... more than one breath at a time.
MK: I'm sorry, how many times have you inhaled more than one breath at a time of anything?
BC: Is this what they call an intervention?
MK: Why?
BC: It is, isn't it? Woo BABY! I've had an intervention! I am COOOOOOOOOOOOL.
{Pause}
BC: Ooooohhhh HEEEEEEEEEEEELLL-O, Mr. Camel! Are you here for my intervention too? Why do I have the urge to DANCE? And SING? And SING AND DANCE! WHOOP!
{THUNK}
BC: Ow.
MK: {chuckling} Now you see the problem?
BC: This is the floor!
MK: Yep.
BC: I WAS on the kitchen table.
MK: Yes.
BC: I fell down.
MK: Yes.
BC: Oopsie. HEEEEEEEEEEEELLL-O, FLOOR! It's SOOO nice to meet you again!
MK: No more catnip for you.
BC: But ... WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! ... Round and round and round and round and SQUARE! Purple feet! Monday! HEEEEEEEEEEEELLL-O, Monday! Monday has purple feet! Oh hooo, DANCE with me! I can't move! I can't move .... oooooooooooh REEED!
MK: Sleep it off.
BC: Counting the fishy! One fishy! Two fishy! Three fishy! .... 

One hundred fishy treats on the wall, one hundred fishy treats. 
Take one down, Bear scarfs it down, ninety-nine fishy treats on the wall. 
Ninety-nine fishy treats on the wall, ninety-nine fishy treats. 
Take one down, Bear scarfs it down, ninety-eight fishy treats on the wall. 
Ninety-eight fishy treats on the wall, ninety-eight fishy treats. 
Take fifty down, Bear scarfs them down, forty-eight fishy treats on the wall.
{Bear snores loudly.}

Picture of the Day:


Featured post of the Day:
Bear puts on a show of a different color ... Kitty Diva or Pop "Tart?"

22 comments:

  1. I'm gonna have to agree with Momma Kat...you are *stoned*, Bear MOL!!!

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  2. Uh oh, Bear. We see an intervention in your future, buddy.

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    Replies
    1. A SECOND one?!?! COOL! Surely that will increase my street cred, right?

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  3. Bear, the first step to getting better is admitting you have a problem. Are you out of catnip? Then we don't see what the problem is, either.

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    1. No catnip? CATASTROPHE! I don't understand why my Momma never bought me this stuff before! She acts like she doesn't act the same way around Kit Kats!

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  4. Bear, you, Esme and Levon should have a catnip party! (whispers) when your Mama is not home obviously! ;p

    the critters in the cottage xo

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    1. I like to misbehave IN FRONT of her! What's the point of misbehaving if no one sees it? Then again, there's a reason I'm always grounded. ~Bear Cat

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  5. Happy to have found your blog from the Nose-to-Nose awards, congrats on being a finalist! Super cute post, but....MORE photos please! catchatwithcarenandcody

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    1. I'm glad you said this because that's the next thing on my to-do list. I'm a horrible photographer, so naturally, I just don't include that which is my weakness. But you are right (and I appreciate the reminder).

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  6. Your Momma can't take your nip away- that would be cruel.

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    1. I know! I'd have to face reality!! A world with purple feet is so much more fun! ~Bear Cat

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  7. I think Bear and Olive would be great nip buddies!

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    1. Nip is always better with friends ... especially when the friend in question is a pretty lady cat ;) ~Bear Cat

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  8. BC...you are one crazy niphead! We think you need to go cold turkey! XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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    1. Turkey? TURKEY?!?!? WHERE'S THE TURKEY? COLD turkey? I eat my turkey at any temperature! I'll take all the tasty whole turkeys!!! ~Bear Cat

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  9. Heck, nipped up and nowhere to go, that really is the worst feeling. Try getting your peep to cut your nip with chamomile, that's lovely and soothing. I follow mine by a Niptini, hair of the mouse, and fully medicinal! Well that's my story. purrs ERin

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    1. Erin, you are a princess, no doubt. If I follow your routine, do you think I'll be a princess too? Besides turning into a black cat, that's my goal. ~Bear Cat

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  10. A noble aspiration, for sure, but we are all the same under the fur... Now as to routines, hmm, well the natural life is by far the best, plain simple foods and Niptini's stirred not shaken will suffice. Even if you don't get to be the Princess you seek you may find your inner Prince in search of a Princess of your own. purrs ERin PS have you thought of colouring your hair?

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    1. WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY HAIR?!?!? Oh. You mean the black cat thing. I rolled around in a fireplace once. I wouldn't recommend it. Of course, I roll in lots of things like dead ants and mud, but none of those really turn you black like the fireplace. I do have to say, it utterly repulses the humans to roll in any of those things. The look of horror on Momma's face (as she screams, "BEAR! You're NOT a dog!") is MORE than worth it. And I get a second one when I "clean" my fur on her blanket ... hehehe. They make it too easy sometimes :)

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    2. That is exactly why peeps had wood floors in the Palace, however the wool duvet does acquire a lovely new paw motif each time it rains, as do the walls under my windows... not that I have anything to do with those, no ma'am, I always wipe my paws on the doormats, the rugs, the sofa, and the stairs before I go to bed. purrs ERin

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    3. You forgot wiping them on the peep :) I escape outside and stand outside in the rain DARING my Momma to come get me. Then when she wrangles me back inside, I roll around in her lap so all the water beaded up on the surface of my coat is absorbed by her clothes. GENIUS! I should feel bad ... but I don't.

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