Wednesday, April 29, 2015

"Conversations" With Bear Cat: Part 2

Ever wonder about what conversations occur in the Momma Kat household? See the first collection {HERE}.
Here's a sample from the past week (some already posted to Momma Kat's Facebook page):

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat


On playing "fetch":
BC: Meoooooow. Meeeeeeeeeeow. Meow.
MK: What?!?!? I've fed you, cleaned out your litter box, tried to pet you . . . what is wrong? Do you want to play?
{Momma tosses one mousie down the hall. Bear runs after it but comes back without it. Momma tosses a second mousie down the hall, Bear runs after it, but comes back without it. Then repeated a third time, with a third mousie.}
MK: Ummmm . . . the way this works is that you bring mousie back instead of leaving him stranded down the hall.
BC: That sounds like "fetch."
MK: {Exasperated} It used to be one of your favorite games!
BC: Well now I find that demeaning.
MK: But you run after the damn mouse anyway - would it hurt you to bring it back with you?
BC: I'm just making sure my mousie wasn't hurt when you flung him through the air. And you threw him there - so you have to go pick him up. I'm not responsible for cleaning up your messes.
MK: So essentially, I'm playing fetch with myself? Even though you run after the mousie anyway?
BC: Let me guess - you don't like having to "fetch" the mousie yourself because you find it demeaning?
MK: And I clean up after your messes all the time! I can count at least 5 just today.
BC: How many times do I have to tell you?!?!?! They are NOT messes. They are works of art and you are very lucky to get to find them. No one else gets a "Bear Cat original." And they take a lot of forethought and work to produce.
MK: One of these days I'm going to win an argument.
BC: Not likely. Now be quiet - it's nap time.
MK: But . . . you were the one making the commotion while I was trying to work!
BC: You're still talking.
MK: For crying out loud! You're a furry little terrorist!
BC: You're going to find another "Bear Cat original" if you don't be quiet.
MK: @#$%^&*!


On being "Bear":
MK: Biting is not nice! Especially when you've been begging for my attention.
BC: I'm not trying to be nice, I'm just being myself.
MK: Well then - if you're just being yourself, by all means - continue. No matter the pain you cause.
BC: Obviously! You're welcome.
MK: Oddly enough, there's a lesson to be learned here (for me).
BC: You better not bite me. That's not nice.
MK: Just what I need in my life - another hypocrite that's also a terrorist.
BC: Thank you!


On demonstrations of affection (part 2):
BC: OK. You can pet me now.
{Momma continues working}
BC: AHEM. Maybe you didn't hear me before, but you can pet me now. You have a few minutes pre-authorized - so have at it!
MK: I heard you the first time . . . I was just remembering the last few times I touched you . . . with plenty of encouragement on your part . . . I regretted it.
BC: Why?
MK: Would you like me to show you the holes you left in my left arm and right leg? Or the scars from before that?
BC: Oh, those. I was helping you.
MK: ?????????
BC: I have to give you good material for your blog. It's really hard work, but I love you enough to help. No one would read it if I were all love and rainbows.
MK: But you bit me for no reason BEFORE I even thought about blogging about your multiple personalities.
BC: I know - it took you 9 years of my toil and strife for you to figure out that I wanted to be an internet sensation. And by the way, I'm not yet, so you must be doing something wrong because I'm fabulous.
MK: A fabulous pain in my ass.
BC: I've only bit you there once. And that was an accident - I was trying to get the zipper on your back pocket - it looked like a string.
MK: You do realize it hurts when you sink your fangs into my flesh, right?
BC: Duh!
MK: I'm pretty sure love doesn't have to hurt.
BC: Well, judging from the guys you go for . . . I thought that was how it worked.
MK: You just love reminding me of that, don't you?
BC: Pet me NOW. Don't make me go find something to destroy.
MK: Isn't it exhausting to always win?
BC: What other option is there?
MK: Right.


On demonstrations of affection (part 1):
{Momma taking a nap - 2 days after returning from a week long trip.}
BC: {While rubbing up all over momma - very persistently.} Oh Momma, I'm soooo sooo glad you are home. Pet me! Pet me NOW! I can't live another second without loves! I love you so much! NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
{One rub then CHOMP!}
MK: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's going to leave a mark {bruise and scar - in addition to fang hole}. Seriously? After all that effort to wake me up?
BC: You're welcome.
MK: @#$%^&*!
BC: Thank you!

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